Out of the Blue
by The Sacred and Profane
Summary: Yuffie has some news for her husband. Reno/Yuffie oneshot. Please R&R.


Out of the Blue

AN: I own nothing in this story, including the song lyrics. Please R&R.

As Reno ate the last bite of his amazing dinner cooked by his newlywed wife, the Turk had to wonder why a guy like him got to be with someone as great as her. After swallowing, he smiled widely at Yuffie.

"Thanks babe, that was great." Yuffie returned the smile and tapped her fingers on the table.

"You're welcome, by the way I'm pregnant." Reno didn't respond right away, instead he took a keen interest in the patterns on the ceiling. "I said I'm pregnant Re!" He chuckled at her indignation, as if she had told him an amusing joke.

"That's a good one honey." Yuffie sighed and slid a piece of paper across the table. After Reno had read it's contents he met her gaze. "So are you going to kill me for not believing you right away?" His wife merely smiled at him, the kind that always made him want to double check his Materia.

"No, I think you'll suffer enough during the next nine months," Yuffie replied.

"You're the one who's going to get fat and want weird things to eat," Reno shot back. Yuffie decided to ignore that for now and bring it up a few months later.

"Aren't you excited?"

"It hasn't really sunk in yet; never saw myself as the family type but then again I never thought I'd marry either." The next few months were going to be fun, Yuffie thought. Maybe not for her body but her mind would be very entertained watching Reno deal with her.

**June**

The puking was the first thing Reno heard the morning of the first month after Yuffie had told him the news. He opened his eyes a few moments later and plodded into the bathroom. Yuffie was on her knees before the porcelain throne, hands gripping both sides to steady herself.

"It's okay, babe, we'll get through this," Reno said, laying a hand on his wife's shoulder.

"Baby, when I'm done puking everything I ate last year out of my body I'm going to stick those goggles and your EMR so far up your-your..." but her rant was cut off by some dry heaves and then wetter ones after that. Reno heaved a sigh of relief, in his head, because he really didn't want to find out if she would carry out her threat.

**July**

By the second month Reno was acting more considerate. He wanted to live to see his child born after all. So when Yuffie had walked into the living room and he saw her slumped shoulders Reno knew to watch his mouth.

His wife walked in front of him and gestured to her stomach.

"Do I look fat Reno?" Reno decided to be truthful and nice at the same time.

"No Yufs, you've just got a little muffin bulging over your shorts." Reno poked her growing stomach then and looked up at her. Instead of the chuckle he might have gotten two months ago, he suddenly found himself staring into two burning gates ordering him to abandon all hope where her kind eyes normally were. "Um...I love you?" Against all odds this question seemed to work as her expression changed and her lips turned up into a smile.

"Ah, I love you too honey. I love you so much that I wouldn't want you to hurt your back sleeping on the hard mattress. I think the garage will be a lot better, yes it will."

Later that night, as Reno cuddled up to the boiler for warmth, he made a mental note to never compare a pregnant woman's stomach to a muffin ever again.

**September**

Reno tossed and turned in bed but the noise persisted. He opened his eyes and blinked a couple times. Sleep had become a luxury these past few days as Yuffie had discovered something horrible in one of her pregnancy books. Apparently children could become smarter if they listened to music while in the womb. Unfortunately, Yuffie had decided to take the advice to heart.

_"Groovin' Magic_

_The ice dilutes my soda_

_The bittersweet color of love_

_Makes my chest feel tight_

_Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooooooh..."_

The lyrics were burned into Reno's brain and Yuffie slept through the Wutaian pop music even though the volume was at maximum on her Ipod. He looked at the clock. He had two hours until he had to go to work. This kid better be a damn genius after all this, Reno thought to himself. And the music played on and on....

**December**

The knocking on her door made Tifa grumble in annoyance. But Cloud was dead to the world thanks to a rough day of delivering. So with a sigh, she got out of bed and went down the stairs, her body waddling against her will. When she opened the door, she was surprised to find Reno on the other side. He looked as tired as she felt.

"I'm sorry for bugging you Teef but Yuffie needs some of your hash browns right now." Tifa was tempted to send him back to Yuffie empty handed but she was too kind for that and so she showed him in while she went to make Yuffie's meal.

Half an hour later it was finished and Reno thanked Tifa as she waddled towards him with the container of hash browns, her round belly slightly poking out from under her black shirt. He decided to speak what his sleep deprived mind had noticed.

"You know you look kinda slobby dressed in black, right?" The pregnant barmaid was tempted once again but this time she wanted to knock Reno out. But she was too kind so she settled on something else.

When Reno entered the bedroom, Yuffie smiled widely.

"You got the hash browns, thanks Reno!" As he slid into bed beside his wife, Reno watched as she plucked the bits of hash browns dangling from his ear and pop it in her mouth. Once she was finished picking all the bits of food off, she kissed him on the cheek. "Man that was good! You know what would go great with that?" Reno wanted to cry, he wanted to scream, but most of all he wanted to live in a world where pregnancy never happened and children were delivered by the Stork and grew out of seeds. But he loved Yuffie so he smiled at her.

"What would go with that?"

"Some of Laney's homemade fudge of course," Yuffie replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"So you want it tomorrow right?" Yuffie laughed at Reno's question and patted him on the shoulder.

"That's hilarious Re, you should be a stand up comic: Reno the Turkey, I can see it now!" When he didn't laugh at what Reno assumed was a joke, Yuffie poked him in the shoulder.

"That food isn't going to get itself Reno..." Taking the not so subtle hint, Reno left for the third time that night to sate Yuffie's Buddha of a belly. Reno was worried she was carrying more than the baby in there. He hoped Elena wouldn't dump the fudge on him.

**February**

The last month found Yuffie acting strangely. The hormones were now making the normally upbeat and happy go lucky ninja a giggling powder keg. Nearly anything could make her laugh or cry. Reno thought she had a limit to what set her off but then he saw her staring out the window with tears in her eyes, so he asked her what was wrong.

"The plastic bag baby is so lonely out there..." was the reply he got.

"I'm sure it's parents will come pick it up," Reno remarked. At that Yuffie had started sobbing and buried her face in Reno's chest. Amid her tears he made out several sentences such as Godo was right, I hate Materia, and why were my boobs still smaller than Tifa's? Reno eventually managed to soothe her and was walking to the fridge to get her some ice cream when he tripped over his own feet.

"Way to go Larry, say how are Curly, Moe, and Shemp?" Yuffie said, guffawing loudly. Suddenly, an idea entered Yuffie's brain. "Re, that's what we should call the kids!" Yes, kids because they had found out that Yuffie wasn't carrying one bundle of joy but rather two little cherubs.

"Um there are only two kids Yuffs," Reno said.

"So we'll call one Moe Curly and the other one Larry Shemp!" Yuffie shot back. Reno shook his head and returned to his wife with her rocky road ice cream.

As she was eating the frozen treat, she thought of another great idea.

"You know this is good but it could really use some of Shera's steak sauce." Reno's eye twitched.

"But she lives in Rocket Town, babe." Yuffie nodded her head.

"Yeah so you better get over there and back before this melts, huh?"

"What's going to happen if I'm not back in time?" Yuffie smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek before replying.

"Then I'll invite Daddy over here and you can share a room with him, it'll be fun, right?" Reno shuddered at that punishment. Godo hated his son in law and snored louder than Bahamut could roar. Reno left as fast as he could, hoping he'd make it in time and glad Yuffie usually ate large cartons of ice cream these days.

* * *

Reno was certain he wouldn't be able to use his hands ever again. Yuffie had been in labor for forty hours and Reno hoped the babies would be born soon. And finally, after yelling, cursing, and breaking Reno's wrist, the babies came.

Yuffie looked up at him as he stood by her bedside once the twins had been returned to her. Both were wrapped in pink blankets and they blinked their blue eyes at the world they had found themselves thrust into.

"You pick their first names and I'll decide their middle names, okay?" At Yuffie's request, Reno nodded. He reached out a hand towards the girl on the right only for the newborn to grip his finger tightly.

"Rydia..." The other baby started gurgling then and Reno turned his attention to her. "Celes..."

"Rydia and Celes Kisaragi...I like it. Godo will hate those names, nice job."

"I love you, Yuffie." Yuffie kissed him on the cheek then and both parents returned their attention to their children.

"I'm sure they'll love you too. Of course when they hate their names when they're teenagers I'll let them know who was responsible." Reno chuckled and nodded once more. "This is your daddy you two, I know he's not the best looking guy in the world but try to love him anyway, okay?"

"You girls better hope you don't snore like Mommy does," Reno commented.

"I love you too, Reno," Yuffie replied, rolling her eyes. And she really did, despite the fact that he couldn't cook to save his life and left the toilet seat up way too much. She prayed her children wouldn't inherit any of those habits.


End file.
